One of the greatest tragedies in the world is not feeling loved!
When a person of any age does not feel loved, respected or wanted, they can and will go to extreme measures to find love, and just as far to push you away.
All too many times they will struggle to find true love because they have been wounded so deeply they cannot trust anyone.
When a child does not feel loved they will build a wall to protect themselves from being hurt again.
When that child becomes an adult, they will not allow anyone to get into their heart.
They will have a hard time trusting anyone; the hurt is so deeply ingrained in their thinking it becomes a way of survival, which is your brains number one function; to keep you safe.
Now you have someone with a highly sensitive, overactive brain that is sending warning signals about everyone that gets too close. And they struggle with the conflicting, overwhelming desire to be loved.
Now there is a wounded child in an adult body that is afraid to be alone and fearful of allowing anyone getting too close. Then someone comes along that is able to hide their brokenness long enough to build hope that someone is going to love them.
So they give all they got to please the other broken person because they think that will seal their love for them, until they cannot give enough and that broken person gets angry because they are not getting what they wanted, which was not real love in the first place.
Now the broken person is angry with the other broken person because neither of them are getting what they thought they needed from each other. They are both demanding that the other one give them what they do not have themselves.
The problem is they cannot give what they do not have. However, they will give what they do have. Whatever is in them will come out when they are pushed in the corner.
So now you have two people that are demanding the other give them what they do not have, and the other cannot give what they do not have. Now both people are reinforcing the walls that keeps angry people away from their heart.
To make matters worse, they are even more upset because the other broken person is not showing them love and respect in the way they are demanding the other should be doing.
So now we have a vicious circle that cannot stop until someone jumps off the crazy train and gets help to take care of their own love deficit.
Remember this all started because someone did not feel loved, a love need that is never met will not be healed.
You do not need to go back to the person that did not give you what they should have; you do need to visit that memory and rewrite how you see it and what you think about it.
You wrote the narrative in the first place, you can go back and write a new meaning to it. It is your story, you can rewrite the meaning to any part of it anytime you want.
Papa Ray Hurst